Thursday, December 17, 2009

Spread too thin?

I don't know about y'all, but ever holiday season that rolls around, I am left wondering: what happened to the fun and excitement of Christmas I felt as a child? Well, obviously, I am an adult now and have more responsibilities, etc, but the past few years, I have felt at times overwhelming anxiety towards all of the stresses of preparing for a holiday. I always try my best to shop ahead of time, but I always seem to forget something or someone, and have to go out last minute to buy a gift. I also feel stress about my items I bought online arriving on time. This one is huge for me this year- I bought several gifts for important people, like my dad, grandmother, and husband, that have still not arrived. So now, instead of feeling like I can throw back an eggnog and start rocking out to Christmas tunes, I feel worried and fret over these things.

I also feel stress about committing ourselves to too many events during the holiday season. For example, I just had an unpleasant conversation with Mr. jme re: this weekend. A few weeks ago, my FIL, in his usual fashion, pressured Mr. jme into agreeing to go to a Christmas party this Saturday night of some acquantances in our Mardi Gras society. Well, fast forward to this week, and my FIL announces that we are having our family get together on Friday night. Well, fuck. We have already committed to both, so instead of resting and getting ready to head up to my mom's next week, we will be spending time getting ready for both parties, getting a Secret Santa gift for the party on Saturday, and recovering from both nights all day Sunday.

Don't get me wrong: I love parties, and normally I would love a double header weekend. However, this is a weekend where I need to get organized and prepare for being out of town for 5 days. I just wish we could have only gone to one, and spent the rest of the weekend being smart and getting ready for a seamless exit from Mobile Thursday.

To top it all off, I am in my third medicated cycle, and my CD 12 u/s check is Christmas Eve. So, depending on what my RE says, I will either have to a) take my trigger with me to my mom's and find a way for me and Mr. jme to bone while we are there, or b) have to cut the trip short and return for yet another ultrasound the day after Christmas, more than likely.

So, where I am going with all of this? I was just reminiscing about the holidays when I was younger. Even as a teenager and college student, I loved just spending time in my home with my loved ones, soaking in the Christmas spirit and making memories, not spending my time at the mall, or the RE, or being stressed b/c I don't have enough time to do what I need to.

Sorry for the mega vent, just wanted to throw it out to the universe. I have to admit, I do feel better after release.

2 comments:

  1. Ugh, I feel the same exact way. I wish we didn't get invited to things sometimes. I just want to watch Christmas specials and Christmas movies, wrap gifts, drink some cocoa and snuggle up with my honey in front of the fire.

    Let's raise a huge glass of egg nog to that good old Christmas stress!

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  2. I hear you about the holiday stress. I had a Christmas shopping breakdown yesterday - DH's family (mostly his sister) is so high maintenance about gifts and phone calls and cards on Christmas and birthdays that it stresses me out to the point where I want to say fvck it! And just boycott them all.

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